Falling in love (in this case, from a person and not from a place) can be one of the many awesome side effects of a language stay abroad. But on the return, it is sometimes difficult not to transform the physical distance into the emotional distance. Of course, you will no longer have to shave your legs every day or permanently clean your apartment. However, you will have to show determination and optimism and make many efforts to turn the long-haul distance into a long-term love story. However, nothing is impossible, and these tips about optimizing a remote relationship should allow your romance to flourish, regardless of the number of kilometers that separate you. Be sure to take action in the distance: some efforts can really go a long way.
1. Find the best time to communicate (regularly)
Although you always have the ability to send SMS and e-mails, 7 days a week, 24 hours a day, you also sometimes just need to talk and get immediate feedback. Depending on the distance, it may take some time to find the most conducive moment for conversations, but it is by forging that you become a blacksmith and the humorous voice messages sometimes compensate for missed connections and synchronization issues. No importance that you can only call Sunday morning – the key is to find a moment to share with the loved one.
2. Find the best channels to stay in touch
Once you have resolved the timing issues, it will be equally important to finding the ideal channels. Luckily, staying in touch with the world has never been easier or more affordable. A Wi-Fi connection is usually all you need to communicate via Skype, chat, and SMS. Make sure your main communication tool is easily accessible to all of you and remember that having different channels will make your communications much more interesting.
3. Be creative
Record an audio message overnight, write a letter, send a postcard or make a surprise package or cassette of your favorite tunes. Use your imagination and find new and innovative ways to bring attention to your partner. You should not empty your bank account – instead of renting a plane to convey poems across the sky, why not hide some sweet notes in the apartment on your next visit? Wanna try these tips about optimizing a remote relationship?
4. Do not try to avoid conflict
If you only meet at intervals of a few weeks or months, and in addition, you speak a different language, it is easy to ignore problems or concerns. You do not have time to waste in arguments when you have only 48 hours to spend together. Avoiding conflicts and staying away from any discussion can be harmful in the long run. The more angry topics you tackle before they turn into insurmountable obstacles in your relationship, the better. However, do not quarrel with sms or e-mail (too hard to read between the lines) interposed, instead try to discuss the problem face to face or over the phone as soon as possible. That being said…
Always try to be open and honest about your feelings. Ignoring where the loved one is, at each moment, or with whom he or she spends Saturday night can lead to unnecessary thought and panic. The fact that social media makes it easy to see (or imagine) the good times your partner experiences makes things a little easier. It is important to have enough confidence in each other to share your thoughts and feelings. You will be able to overcome, together, jealousy, anxiety or doubts.
6. See the glass half full
Living essentially your daily life, while having a relationship at a distance, can be both a blessing and a curse. You may feel that you are missing something because it is much more difficult to have “normal couple” activities, such as getting your spouse to work or going out to lunch together. However, this can also be a huge personal benefit. Indeed, if you have to spend long hours studying or working, you will not have to cancel your dinner plans or your movie nights, for example, and disappoint your spouse.
7. Do the boring tasks together
When two lovers are seen only a few times a year, living together is like a vacation. And, after all, it will probably be a vacation, since you will not go to work or school. There’s nothing wrong with having a good time, having a good morning brunch, having a good brunch and sightseeing, but it’s also important to do some boring everyday tasks, such as folding clothes, shopping or mow the lawn. And, trying to do these mundane activities together to make them fun and exciting is a real test of your relationship, is not it?
8. Set the date you will see again
It is important in the tips to optimizing a remote relationship. Depending on the time and money needed to organize a meeting, being together can become a complex operation. Not knowing the date of your next meeting only complicates your feelings and your life projects in a broad sense. It is, therefore, best to try to set a new date as soon as possible upon your return home. So you can both plan ahead and enjoy discounted tickets and special offers, not to mention having a goal! (The surprise tours are also great, of course, so take them into consideration, if you can.)
9. Share activities
The moments of desperation must be compensated by creative ways of spending time together. Without necessarily being together in the same place, you can still share some activities. Thanks, the functions of the video call! Nowadays, you do not really have an excuse not to share the screen for cooking, sharing a meal, shopping or walking together by video chat. Remember that you can also watch the same movie while chatting or chatting together.
10. Keep a souvenir gift
Sometimes, no call or sms compensates for the absence of the loved one, so that wearing his favorite shirt or drinking in his favorite cup could help you. Souvenirs may seem tacky, but they are certainly very effective. A sample of her favorite laundry or perfume may be enough to make time zones disappear for just a moment – do not have any complex to take this path, when you feel desperate the absence of the loved one.
11. Meet people and visit places
The more you discuss and get to know each other, the more you mention places or people that the other person may not know. Whenever you have the opportunity, introduce the loved one – through a photo or a real visit – to the places you go to most and the people you meet or mention the most often. Thus, everyday conversations will become much more meaningful and will make you feel part of your life, despite the distance
I hope these tips about optimizing a remote relationship can be useful for you.